Sunday, February 28, 2010

If you have ever said something and then immediately thought "I never thought I'd have to say THAT!", you should go to Meanest Mommy.Com and read her rules. Hilarious! Here are some of my favorites:

Rule #256: Cereal found under the couch (or under the pew cushions at church, or your coat pocket, or the bottom of Mommy’s purse . . . fill in the blank) is not an appropriate snack.

Rule #250: If you make so much noise that you wake the baby, please do not ask me to turn up the tv so you can hear over his screaming.
Rule #242: No matter how good it smells, you may not stick the chocolate chips up your nose. And most certainly do not attempt to eat extracted chocolate chips afterwards.
Rule #237: Your effort to avoid puking on the clean sheets is admirable. Next time, try also not to puke over the side of the bed onto your sister’s upturned, smiling face.
Rule #231: When we spend 20 minutes searching everywhere for your brother’s mittens, it would be helpful for you to reveal that they are on your hands.
Rule #225: Once you have said “Mommy” (or any version of “Mommy”) 50,000 times in one day, please just stop talking.

Rule #213: No, you may not play the harmonica in the baby’s room while she is taking a nap.

Rule #198: No, you may not glue those googly-eyes on your penis and scare your brother and/or dad tonight when you’re changing into your pajamas at bedtime.

Rule #180: Do not go “check on” your baby brother when he’s sleeping. And if you do, don’t slam the door during your escape attempt.

Rule #29: Just because you don’t feel like taking a nap doesn’t mean that your little brother doesn’t need one. Quiet down, kid!

Rule #22: No, I will not give you more bath water. You had plenty until you dumped half of it on the bathroom floor.

Rule #19: Nothing good comes from you crawling around on the kitchen table.

Rule #8: Spitting in Daddy’s face is not funny. Ever.

Rule #4: No screaming loudly for more goldfish crackers when there’s a big pile of goldfish crackers right in front of you.

Rule #1: Toddlers & syrup do not mix.


mandy said...

Too funny!